Monday, November 3, 2008

As parents, we've all heard that in good parenting you mustn't punish with a consequence that you know you can't or won't keep. Like when you say to your child, You better be good or Santa will not come to our house. But inevitably, every year Santa comes anyways. OR when you say, Stop it or I'll leave you on the side of the road. Really, are you really going to leave your kid on the side of the road?

I found myself at a crossroads on Halloween day. All day long I had been telling the boys that they need to clean their room so we can go do something fun. The do something fun came and went, now it was you need to clean your room so you can go out and play. It eventually turned into, you need to clean your room by 3 o'clock or you can't go out and play. Then it was, you're not getting dinner until your room is cleaned. And then, I did it. After yelling all day, and being ignored by my children, I blurted out, "If you don't get your room cleaned in 20 minutes, I WILL NOT take you trick or treating." Twenty minutes came and went and no clean room. They must have thought I was joking or something.

Joking, I was not. I was not taking them trick or treating. And I did not feel bad about my decision one bit. Ok, I did just a little, but I gave them sufficient time to get their chore done. I would think that giving them all day into the night should suffice.

Shortly after I made it very clear we were not going, Kurt came home. The boys were crying hysterically, and I told Kurt what was going on. He took the boys into the other room and had a pep talk with them. Before I knew it, I was being smothered with hugs and kisses, and this note

Kurt had taught them the art of Kissing Butt.

The little suckers. What could I do but give in. I had broken the law of punishing and not sticking with the consequence. We went trick or treating. Bad parenting on my part? Maybe. Smart enough to get my kids' word that they are going to clean their room at the drop of a hat, oh and give me half of their candy? Yes.

9 comments:

Meridee said...

That was a cute litte note, how could you not take them trick or treating? It was fun seeing you the other night. You guys rock! BTW. . .Darin loves me!

The Kraus House said...

you and I both are such push overs. Heaven help us!!!

much love to ya

Danielle said...

unfortunately and to matt's dismay, I totally give in, unless I am totally ticked, then watch out.

Brittney said...

Very cute and sweet. I agree, that note threw all logic and reason out the window.:)

I hear you on the threats falling on deaf ears. I HAVE actually left one on the side of the road...kind of...I drove about 15 feet before they were screaming bloody murder so I stopped but they saw that I was serious, and that I really would do it! I felt like such a jerk for it (I probably was a jerk for doing it, but I had had it that day!

Tamara said...

Hurray to Kurt for finding a way out for everyone!

I hear you about the frustrations and threats--wish I had a solution, but I also resort to these sometimes.

BTW, my dad left me on the side of the road once as a kid, and I have to say that I never really forgave him for it. He drove over a hill and waited for me to walk up and see his car. Unfortunately, it was July in the AZ desert, so I really had no choice but to get back in the car.

khepworth said...

Maybe I need to retract my statement of leaving your kid on the side of the road.....ha, ha!

Brittany Kaaiakamanu said...

I'm such a push-over as well. Kalea is going to get away with everything, Vince is always the bad guy, haha.

Jon and Melissa said...

Love it. I live on empty threats-but my kids are still young. Pretty soon I am going to have to make good on them. The note is priceless.

Nelson said...

Laughing, laughing, laughing. This is so funny!

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